A Monday evening, cold and dark, finds Mr. Down-Andout
Sat glumly in a bus stop, but there's no bus yet about.
His car is at the garage and he couldn't get a lift,
So he's stuck here half an hour after the end of his work shift.
His boss forgot his name and that promotion got away.
It's just the perfect end to an already lousy day.
So here he is all glum and blue and looking at his feet
When the sound of rattling wheels comes down the otherwise empty street.
He looks up, sees a wagon painted like a circus top
Coming down the road towards him and then squealing to a stop.
A wooden door is opened and a traveller man hops down,
Wearing purple clothes from head to toe, topped with a shining crown.
'I am the Pimp Cup Man,' he says, and bows with graceful flair,
As from the door behind him comes a girl with golden hair.
She kisses Mr. Down-Andout, just once upon his cheek.
'We visit guys and girls like you,' she says, 'Whose life is looking bleak.'
'That's right,' the Pimp Cup Man agrees, and from behind his back
He presents a magic pimp cup, in shiny silver and black.
'If you're feeling sad and lonely and your life feels like it's stuck,
One drink from this will bring you fortune, happiness, and luck.'
With that, they hop back in their cart, drive off without the cup.
He hesitates, but then Mr. Down-Andout picks it up.
When home, alone, and feeling blue, he reaches for a drink,
And pours it in the pimp cup, not quite knowing what to think.
When nothing seems to happen, he just sighs and goes to bed,
Trying not to think of what that strange old traveller said.
When he wakes up, the sun pours through the window by his bed.
The man feels happy, energised to face the day ahead.
At work, he's called in by the boss, who, quite to his surprise,
Not only calls him by the name, but gives him a pay rise.
The garage calls, and who should drive his fixed car out to meet him
But a girl mechanic, just his type – long legs, dark hair, and slim.
'You're into cars?' he asks the girl. 'He's really cute,' she thinks,
And sure enough, within an hour, they're going out for drinks.
Years later, when friends ask him how he met his lovely wife,
He'll say, 'The day the Pimp Cup Man came? Best day of my life.'
So if you need a bit of luck and could do with cheering up,
Then it sounds like you should think about getting yourself a pimp cup.
You could wait for the elusive Pimp Cup Man to come along,
Or take matters into your own hands at PrimePimpin.com
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